It’s not often we get an episode of True Blood in which every storyline touches Sookie’s lifeline in some way, shape, or form. Oh wait. That’s right. It happens all the time. This week, True Blood managed to keep the tradition alive while reminding us that Sookie is both the glue that hold the series together and the dynamite that blows its plots and relationships to smithereens.
And she starts out the episode by standing in the shrapnel shower of her latest big decision: Telling Alcide the truth about who killed Debbie. Lafayette storms out of Merlott’s, chastising her for confessing her guilt to Alcide. She swears Alcide won’t tell (but it’s obvious she’s not really sure that’s true) and that doing right is the only way to get right. Lafayette is livid, worried her passionate, irrational choice will get him locked up for Jesus’ death too. “You’re the f**king angel of death,” he says.
But it’s not just Lafayette. Tara, fresh off her revelation as a self-loathing vampire, is still furious with Sookie for making Pam turn her. When Bill visits Fangtasia and asks Tara about Sookie’s safety, Tara responds with a curt command for him to stop asking. Sookie will be fine. Someone will always protect her. But she makes sure to note that someone else always pays the price. And it’s true. Sookie is at the center (and is often the catalyst) for some of the biggest dramatic problems in Bon Temps. But Tara should step back for a second and remember the time her friendship was the one that caused the whole town to be turned into sex-crazed zombies when a Maenad came to town in Season 2.
Still, the Sookie hate continues. At Merlott’s Sookie experiences a similar level of contempt and curiosity to the time she took a shift after going public with (then) Vampire Bill. Her customers’ and coworkers’ thoughts invade her brain and everyone is thinking about how she had Tara changed into a vampire and whether or not it makes her a terrible person. Because she’s not already worried enough about that herself. She even goes to Jason’s to confess, since he’s the deputy, and he tells her they’re going to keep her out of jail. Of course when she confesses she turned Tara, Jason freaks out completely. Oh, Jason. You’ve always got your priorities straight.
At this point, Sookie is so wrought after the events of the day, confessing to Alcide, and being chewed out by Lafayette that with tears in her eyes she cries, “I ruin lives, Jason!” But does she? Or does she just draw such attention, what with her sweet blood and her ability to read minds, that she’s an unwilling magnet for trouble and those who are willing to protect her? It’s about time True Blood at least opens the door to that question (because we’ve been thinking it for four years) and it seems that Bill may be about to use that quality to his own tactical advantage. But more on that later.
Back at Merlott’s, Lafayette is still livid with Sookie even after she leaves and his dark magic, apparently left from when Marnie stole it from Jesus while she was in Lafayette’s body, comes out in creepy, kindergarten clay mask form and Lafayette (or the dark magic; we’re not quite sure who’s really responsible here) puts a spell on Sookie’s car. Later, when she hops in a drives home from Merlott’s, it begins to speed up and the brakes fail, so she bails right before the car crashes.
Convinced the crash is punishment for her status as a life-ruiner, Sookie walks home and pours herself a glass of every hard liquor known to man. Soon, she’s drunk and singing new vampire lyrics to Rupert Holmes’ “Escape” (yes, sight, the Piña Colada Song). Lafayette calls her; he found her car wrapped around a tree and he’s worried something happened to her. When she sings him the song (literally – she’s wasted, remember?) of what happened to her, Lafayette realizes he’s the one that did it. So that’s happening this season. Why can’t Lafayette just drop the magic and be his magical self so we can actually enjoy his character again? Why, True Blood, why?
Sookie drunkenly puts down the phone as Lafayette tries to do the right thing (like she taught him) and confess, but Alcide is at the door. He didn’t turn her in (because of course he didn’t, he’s a big ol’ lovable softy who just happens to be incredibly attractive, the vampire race’s greatest rival outside of humans, and a man with a raging case of Sookie love). He told Debbie’s parents she was dead, because he’s a good man and he knows they deserve closure. But, he tells them Marcus killed Debbie, got drunk and bragged about it, and Alcide killed him as retaliation. Of course, only the Debbie being dead part and the Alcide killing Marcus part are true, but let’s all take a moment to ooh and ahh over the werewolf who is not only sweet, selfless, heroic, and… okay, let’s just say it : hot. He’s got the cherry on top that he’s also incredibly clever and quick on his feet. Bill and Eric who? (Sorry shippers, but this new Sookie suitor is just so my speed. No disrespect.)
